Trick-or-Treating Lessons

This post is not spiritually uplifting like my other ones, but in the spirit of the holiday I had to post about Halloween.  Halloween is my favorite holiday.  Well, it ties with Christmas.  I feel bad having Halloween be my #1 holiday and Christmas my #2 since Christmas is a Christian holiday and Halloween is a Pagan holiday and I am Christian….  Oh well.  Halloween is my favorite holiday!  There.  I said it.  Anyway, I think part of why is because my birthday is in October, and until I was 12 all of my birthday parties were costume parties. J

So as I went Trick-or-Treating over the years I have learned some pretty funny and interesting lessons:

1. Do NOT go Trick-or-Treating in July.  When I was 4 or 5 years old I did not want to wait until October to go Trick-or-Treating.  So a few times during the same summer I put on one of my dress-ups, grabbed a bucket and went trick-or-treating without telling my parents.  We lived in an apartment complex in Orem at this point in my life, so there were several people living close together that I could visit!  I remember that some people were nice and gave me candy, others told me kindly to come back in October and they would have some candy for me, and one yelled at me to leave and not come back again.  When my parents found out they were not very happy with me.  They took me to every apartment that I went to and made me give their candy back and apologize for going trick-or-treating “when I wasn’t supposed to.”  I was crying the whole time.  I remember that all of them forgave me.

2. If there is a house that gives out King Size bars, go there first!  The years that we did not make it before that house ran out of candy were very devastating.  We always went there first and then did our traditional route.

3. Do NOT ditch your friends.  One year too many of us decided to go Trick-or-Treating in one group.  Because there were so many of us we wasted so much time running around skipping houses so that we could go to all of our parents’ and some grandparents’ houses.  So at one point, myself and three others, ran away from the rest of the group and finished our trick-or-treating without skipping any houses.  Later that night, when I was already home, the rest of the group showed up at my parents house to ask me why I ditched them.  I told them why and they left.  The next day at school was pretty awful.  I really should have stuck the night out, learned my lesson and go trick-or-treating in a smaller group the next year.

4.  Before calling the police about a prank, try to find out as much information as possible.  One year a guy in a mask jumped out from behind a fence with a fake chainsaw (we did not know that it was fake at the time), causing my brother to fall down and scrape his knee.  The guy jumped in a car that drove away.  He was still quite young and was too hurt and upset to finish trick-or-treating – we had barely just started!  So we took my brother home and told my mom what happened.  We were able to describe the car and she called the police.  My friends and I went back out to finish trick-or-treating and I promised my brother that he could have half my candy.  We ran into some other friends and told them what happened, and they told us who the masked guy was, and it just so happens that we knew him and his house happened to be on our route.  So when his mom answered the door we told her what happened.  The next part of the story is from my friend’s point of view who was in another group.  So my friend was trick-or-treating with this guy’s younger sisters.  All of a sudden their mom’s van came screeching next to them, the doors opened and she yelled at all of them to get in the van.  Once they were inside she started driving and told them what happened and that they had to find their brother and hide his car in their aunt’s garage.  The next Sunday at Church they guy apologized to my brother.  Now my friend – who was in the other group – and I talk about this story we just laugh and laugh and laugh.

 5. The rich neighborhoods do not give out better candy.  My last Halloween trick-or-treating I wasted time driving around with my friends going to the rich neighborhoods in Provo.  I got the same kind of candy as I would have in my own neighborhood.  In fact, I got less because: 1) we wasted time driving, and 2) those houses are BIGGER which means LESS of them on a street which means LESS candy!

So those are the five Trick-or-Treating lessons that I have learned over my life so far.  I hope all of you have a Happy Halloween tomorrow!  (Or today, if you are reading this on the 31^st.)  Be safe if you are leaving your house, and be nice if you are the one handing out candy. J

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

The Scriptures, the Ensign and my Anger

About two years ago I was visiting Gerson at work and struck up a conversation with one of his coworkers.  I didn’t know it at the time, but I ended up saying something that offended her.  A couple days later she told Gerson what I had said.  She admitted to Gerson that she realized right after she was done talking to me that my intensions were not to be mean, but she still wanted to inform him of what I had said.  When Gerson got home and told me about the conversation I felt really embarrassed, and I usually turn my embarrassment into anger.  I was angry with myself for hurting her feelings, and I was also angry with her for telling Gerson even though she admitted she knew that I wasn’t trying to be mean.  I felt like she was infringing on my marriage by trying to get Gerson to correct and fix me.

It took me a long time to get over it.  An unfortunate trait of mine is that when something upsets me I hang on to it for a long time.  I don’t dwell on it every day, but if I get reminded of it then I get upset all over again.  However, I was about to make a choice that would bring a positive change to how I handle my anger and my temper.

Soon after this incident it was Christmas time, and my grandma paid for the next year’s Ensign subscription for my and Gerson’s Christmas present.  I decided to actually start reading more than the Visiting Teaching Message.  I wanted to make sure that I finished one issue before the next month’s arrived.  I really enjoy all of the articles and stories!  A few months into consistently reading the Ensign I noticed that the little things that used to get to me didn’t.  For example when another driver cuts me off I used to honk and yell and be angry.  While it’s still annoying when something like that happens – and a little scary if you have to slam on your breaks – I have recently tried to stay calm, shrug it off and focus on driving safely instead of yelling.

Shortly after I found out that I was pregnant with Benjamin I started re-reading the Book of Mormon.  I tried to read one chapter a night before bed.  Of course there were nights where I missed reading, but I didn’t give up like I have in the past where weeks and months have passed before I read again.  When I finished the Book of Mormon I did something I haven’t done in the past either:  I started reading the Doctrine and Covenants for the first time.  Yeah I had read passages at church, but never on my own or all the way through.  It’s still difficult to understand certain passages, but I really enjoyed what I cold understand and definitely felt my faith increasing.  I recently finished the D&C and have started on the Pearl of Great Price for the first time.

Very recently in Relief Society lesson I likened something I read in the D&C to the topic for that Sunday.  Right after I finished speaking another sister corrected my interpretation of the verse.  I was taken aback at first, but I continued to focus on the lesson – and Benjamin who decided I could no longer sit in my chair to keep him happy.  When I went home from church that day I did not complain to Gerson and pout over the situation like I have done in the past.  I have come to the conclusion that when in these kind of situations both the listener and the speaker are in charge of interpretation.  It is very common to say that we need to think before we speak – and that is true, don’t get me wrong!  But as a listener I also need to step back and look at the situation before getting upset, it takes both sides to evade offense.  While looking at my recent experience I realized that I had taken something out of context in that verse and that sister helped me understand it better.  Also, she didn’t start her correction off with “I disagree” or “You’re wrong” or any other way to demean me.  In realizing that, I was able to move on from that small embarrassment.

I truly believe that the consistent scripture and Ensign reading I have implemented into my life has helped me develop more patience when it comes to my anger.  The funny thing is I didn’t have those intentions when I started reading, it is something that I just recently picked up on.  I know that in reading as often as I can – I still miss some nights (gasp!) – the Spirit is with me and helps me stay calm and forgiving in these situations.  I don’t want you to think that I am magically perfect at not getting offended or saying the right thing when speaking to others.  But I am working on it.  Sometimes it takes me a day or more to take a step back and look at the situation from a different angle.  I still get upset and lose my temper, but I’m doing better at the amount of time it takes to calm down.    I have also learned something else with this experience: forgiving someone who will never apologize because they don’t know that they hurt you (and in some cases don’t care) is really hard, but when you do – oh the positive feeling is so worth it!

Of course there are more ways than one to make positive changes in your life.  I now invite you to think about a new habit you have picked up or a change you have made either recently or years ago that added positive experiences to your life.  Write down what the change was and write down the experiences you had because of it.  And/or if you want to make a change now write down what you want to do and as you implement that in your life write down the positive experiences that you have because of it.  And remember, Heavenly Father loves you and if you ask Him, He will help you with anything you are going through. 

Remembering Joshua

On October 4, 2005 my cousin Joshua Michael Eisenstat returned to our Heavenly Father.  October 4^th was on a Monday that year, and it was right after General Conference.  My dad was at the hospital with Joshua’s mom, Selma and his dad, Mike.  My dad called me and my brother at home to tell us what happened.  We both sat in our rooms and cried until my dad came and took us to the hospital.  When I entered Joshua’s room the first thing I did was go to Jamie and hug for a long time.  Jamie is Joshua’s sister, and not only my cousin but also a best friend.

Throughout the day family members who lived in Utah arrived at the hospital while those outside Utah called to let Selma know when they would be here.  At one point Jamie wanted to go on a walk and I accompanied her.  We found a waiting room and sat in some chairs.  Suddenly she looked at me and said, “I’m not as sad anymore.  I know where he is.  I know that he is with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.  He is perfect now.”

Joshua was 23 years old when he passed away.  He was special needs, and I would like to emphasize the word special.  His brain functioned at about a two-year-old level, but his man-sized heart loved everyone.  He would say hi to family, friends and strangers.  He would give high fives to family, friends and strangers.  And he would give handshakes to family, friends and strangers.

If I could, I would have contacted everyone on my dad’s side of the family and asked for their favorite Joshua memory.  However, that would be a book, not a post (maybe one day).  You see, Selma is the fourth of twelve children and Joshua is the third of 38 grandchildren (so far, I’m pretty sure more are coming).  So I’m going to focus on a few of my memories and invite friends and family who knew Joshua to post their memories in the comments – and sign the comment with how Joshua pronounced your name. 

Joshua loved Barney, and every time he left his house he had to carry a Barney tape with him (you know, the VHS things no one uses anymore).  Well, our family used to have lots of family gatherings in the mountains; usually at a BBQ area in either Provo or American Fork canyon.  At one such occasion Joshua threw his Barney video-tape into the river – oh yeah, Joshua liked to throw things, it didn’t matter what or where.  I mean he has thrown toys over fences, toys in rivers, and French fries out of the car window.  Anyway, so Jamie and I got elected to go after the tape.  We were young enough at the time that jumping into the river to go after Joshua’s Barney tape was actually quite fun, and it made Joshua laugh. 

Joshua was tall and skinny – he was only 99 pounds.  But his arms were long and so when he hugged you his arms wrapped all the way around your body.  I loved hugs from Joshua!  He would squeeze so tight and then say, “Awwww.”  You knew that you were loved when he hugged you that way.   He couldn’t pronounce everyone’s name correctly, but his names for us sure were cute and special.  My dad’s name is Glenn, Joshua pronounced it “Brwen.”  My mom’s name is Debbie, Joshua yelled, “Debeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!”  The longer the better.  My brother’s name is Michael, Joshua called him “Mitoe.”  He sometimes got my name right and sometimes missed the L and said, “Chessey.”

He also has these phrases that our family still to this day imitates:

“Where is he?”

“Wha happen?”

“Where’s Selma?”

“I did it!”

Oh and that laugh!  That laugh of pure joy!  I have no idea how to type that one out, but if you have ever heard him laugh, you know that I am talking about.

Joshua LOVED my mom.  One year we were all in St. George visiting Grandma and Grandpa.  It was bedtime and all of us were kneeling in the front room for family prayer.  Joshua decided to jump on my mom in a piggy-back fashion, wrapped his arms around her neck and both of them went crashing to the floor.  Anyone who knows my mom can see her facial expression as this was happening and hear her “bwaaaah!” come out of her mouth.  It was quite entertaining for everyone present.

My dad teaches math at Pleasant Grove High School, and for a few years Joshua attended the special education program there.  One day another faculty member came to my dad’s classroom and said, “Joshua won’t get off the bus, I’m going to watch your class while you help get him off the bus.”  So my dad went on the bus – which was empty except for Joshua – and said, “Joshua!  Throw a pillow at me!”  So Joshua brought his hands together put them over one of his shoulders and “threw a pillow” at my dad.  My dad very dramatically pretended that the “pillow” hit him.  It made Joshua laugh and he came off the bus with my dad. 

Since his passing our family has termed certain moments “Joshua Moments.”  Basically we either see something or experience something that reminds us of Joshua and then we go home and email the whole family about it.  We have all had several over the years, but I’m going to share my favorite one.  My junior year in high school (two years after Joshua’s passing) my ballroom team went on a tour to Northern California.  My aunt Vickie got us some shows at the elementary schools that she was the psychologist for.  After one of the assemblies Vickie kept the special education class in the gym while the other classes returned to their classrooms in order for them to interact with my teammates and I.  One of the boys ran straight to me, jumped up in the air, gave me a high five and yelled, “I did it!”  I said, “You did!”  And gave him a hug.  Then I burst into tears.  That was an exact replica of Joshua: high fiving someone and yelling, “I did it!”

Every year on October 4^th everyone in our big Larson family has McDonald’s at some point during the day.  When I got out of class today and I got McDonald’s for Gerson and I to have for dinner.  I got home from class and discovered the Gerson and Benjamin had watched The Sandlot while I was in class.  The Sandlot was one of Joshua’s favorite movies – others include Angels in the Outfield, anything Barney, Wheel of Fortune, and The Price is Right.

This post does not exactly do Joshua justice, like I said before, that would take a book.  However his mom, Selma, has a blog dedicated to him.  Each post is all about him; they are very touching.  I invite you to take a look at it: joshuasheartfullofhugs.blogspot.com. 

Also, I know that you have lost one or more family members – or even friends as well.  I want you to know that it is ok to be sad and miss them, and it is also ok to enjoy and laugh at the memories you have of them.  Take this time to write down a favorite memory of a loved one who has gone home to Heavenly Father.  And remember, they are with Heavenly Father; you will see them again.

Today is October 4, 2014; a year after I first published this post. In honor of Joshua on the day he returned to Heavenly Father, I would like to add an other memory today. My parents often babysat Joshua. One Sunday when he was staying with us, he went with us to our ward. The Sacrament was being passed and Joshua was sitting at the end of our row. The young man who passed the Sacrament to our row was reverently waiting for the Sacrament to be passed back, and Joshua wanted to talk to him. So Joshua said, "Hi!" They young man responded, "Hey buddy what's up!" And he let Joshua shake his hand. :) It was such a great moment. One of many wonderful examples of Joshua's love for everyone around him; and it is also an example of that young man's kindness, an example of how all of us should treat God's children: with kindness, respect and love. No matter how different one may appear from us, we are all God's children and are all brothers and sisters to each other.

Chelsey Ortega: Latter-day Saint, Woman, Dancer, Book Worm, Student, Wife, Mother.

October 2, 2013

As I have read recent articles and blog-posts about the Ordain Women Movement (OWM) in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I have had lots of thoughts and emotions going crazy in my head.  Tonight it got so crazy that I decided I needed to put pen to paper (metaphorically, I’m actually typing this up).  This is more for me – so that I can understand myself – more than it is for others, and I am not sure if I am going to post this, so if you are reading this: congratulations. J

I was born into The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  My parents were sealed in the Manti, Utah Temple and I was born a year and four months later.  I was baptized when I was eight years old.  I remember when my mom told me that I would need to meet with our Bishop before I could be baptized; I asked her what the Bishop would say in the interview.  She told me that he would ask me if I wanted to be baptized (or maybe if I was ready to be baptized – I can’t remember the exact wording).  I asked, “What if I say no?”  My mom replied, “Then you won’t get baptized.”  I remember freaking out and exclaiming that I wanted to be baptized, to which my mom responded then I should tell my bishop yes.  I didn’t realize at the time, but my mom was teaching me that my entire religious life would be based on my choices.  I believe that she truly at that time was allowing me to choose to get baptized.  She was not choosing for me.  During my teenage years I realized what she was teaching me that day.  And I feel like all of my choices have been because I felt them important, I have never felt forced.  Do I always understand why I make a choice?  No.  I use the Spirit and faith for that.

I was born a girl (surprise!) and I am now a 22-year-old woman (23 if you are reading this after October 25^th).  I feel very blessed to live in a time and country where women can vote, work and most important choose to work and vote.  I feel very comfortable with the woman that I have become, and do not feel like I am missing anything due to my gender (except maybe 2 or 3 more kids ;) – but those will come later).

I have taken all sorts of dance classes since I was three years old: Jazz, Tap, Modern, Ballet, Hip Hop and Ballroom Dance.  Ballroom Dance was my main focus during my teenage years.  I performed on my middle school team, my high school team, BYU’s teams and Center Stage’s Adults In Motion team.  I danced competitively while I was in high school and my first year and half at BYU.  Dance does something to my soul that I cannot explain.  It makes me so happy and creates this warm fuzzy feeling inside.  I believe that dancing to certain songs or a dance that sends a specific message can create a very spiritual feeling.

I love to read!  My parents taught me how to read, and before I entered kindergarten I was reading the Babysitter series all by myself.  When I was nine years old my Aunt Vickie got me into Harry Potter (the first three were already published at that time); and I grew up every two years standing in line at midnight to purchase the next book.  My mom stood in line with my brother, Michael, and I for the fourth book, my dad for the fifth, my cousin Jason for the sixth and my cousin Spencer for the seventh (that was my favorite standing-in-line experience, we had so much fun!).  But the most important book I have read is The Book of Mormon.  The first time I read it all the way through, by myself I was eight years old.  I read it for the Faith In God award in Primary (at least I think that’s what the award is called).  I’m pretty sure I only understood the stories that I already had memorized.  The second time I read it I was twelve and was reading it for the Faith Personal Progress project in Young Women.  I probably understood a bit more, but I was on a deadline, so I zoomed through it.  The third time I read it I was fifteen and was reading it for President Hinckley’s challenge to read it by Christmas.  I also zoomed through it this time.  The fourth time I read it was my freshman year at BYU for my Book of Mormon religion class.  I felt like I was beginning to understand a bit more because I had a professor helping me.  My fifth time reading it has been my favorite time.  I started reading it when I found out I was pregnant with Benjamin.  I finished it a week after he was born – if I would have known I was going to be in labor for 60 hours I would have finished it at the hospital!  Unlike my first four times reading the Book of Mormon, I was not on a time limit to finish.  I took my sweet time.  And I felt my faith, testimony and understanding of the Book of Mormon grow tremendously.  I probably still don’t know it as well as the missionaries.  I can’t quote verses and say what book and chapter they come from – I can paraphrase though!  However, I can say with all my heart that I know the Book of Mormon is true – I know that what is written in there is true historically and spiritually.  I know that Jesus Christ visited the people of the Americas, and I know that this book testifies of him.  I absolutely cannot wait to purchase the picture book of the Book of Mormon and read it to Benjamin!

I am currently attending Brigham Young University.  I am majoring in History Teaching and my minor is Teaching English to Students of Other Languages (TESOL).  Most of the people that I went to high school with have already graduated or are about to graduate from college.  The fact that I won’t be graduating until April of 2015 is a little disheartening.  I took a break to have Benjamin and now that he is here I will only be attending part-time.  It’s ok though, he was totally worth it, and I am proud of the fact that I am continuing and will finish and earn my degree eventually.  I love going to BYU.  It was the only school that I applied to and was so happy to get in.  I love the religious additions that the professors bring to their classes – especially my history professors!

I met my husband when I was 18, we got engaged when I was 19 and we got married in the Salt Lake City, Utah Temple three months before I turned 20.  I am a huge advocate for marriage.  We read in the Doctrine and Covenants that marriage in the temple is the New and Everlasting Covenant.  I cried during our sealing ceremony, and my wedding day is one of the top of the best days in my life.  Yes there are moments where marriage is really hard.  There have been moments where I have been so mad at my husband that I have seriously contemplated locking our bedroom door and making him sleep on the couch, but then I realize that I would also be sleeping alone, and quite honestly I am scared of the dark.  So my fear trumps my anger.  Plus we can usually work things out pretty quickly.  Marriage really does take sacrifices.  I believe that I have made some big sacrifices – well to me they were big.  My husband has also made sacrifices during our marriage.  I’m not going to give any examples because I feel like that part of our marriage is for us alone.  Both of us are very happy with the choices we have made together and for each other.  We love each other so much and now extend our love to our son.

 

On July 3, 2012 my husband and I found out I was pregnant.  It felt so surreal that a tiny person was inside me.  We told my parents that day and told my husband’s parents two weeks later.  We ended up telling other family members at a family reunion because I was a little too obviously sick and throwing up.  But the details of my pregnancy for another time.  After 60 hours of labor Benjamin Gerson Ortega entered this life on March 10, 2013 at 11:31 am.  (Once again, the details are for another time.)  Becoming a mom was honestly one of the most spiritual experiences of my life.  When the nurses placed Benjamin into my arms I remember feeling this overwhelming amount of peace, love and calm.  There are several different types of moms out there.  I am currently a stay-at-home-student-mom.  I am currently not working, but I do attend classes at BYU three times a week for two hours.  When I graduate I will be a stay-at-home-mom, and when my youngest enters school (whenever that will be) I will be a working mom.  I think that motherhood is wonderful and an important aspect of a woman’s life.

What does this have to do with the OWM?  Probably nothing.  When I first started typing this I originally planned on quoting different thoughts on OWM from different articles and blog-posts and then expressing my opinion about each quote.  Instead, I discovered who I am and shared what is in my heart.  I’ll admit that I was angry with these women at first, but “who am I to judge another when I walk imperfectly?”  They are daughters of God just like me.  Being exposed to their questions and wants through the media has made me question my feelings on my place in the LDS Church.  I can firmly state that I am 100% comfortable with the role that I have chosen to take.  I am happy where I stand, and I believe all other women deserve to be happy too – even if what makes them happy is different than what makes me happy.  I want to thank all those writers about this movement for motivating me to really look at myself.  I know that Heavenly Father loves me; I know that he loves those women, and I know that he loves you.

Now I invite you to find some words that describe who you are.  Elaborate on them in your mind or on paper.  As you do you will discover what a unique and amazing person you are.  And don’t forget: you are a child of God.